Fresh Start

Chapter 18
New Attitude

Claire Morris waited anxiously for someone to come tell her what was wrong with her son. She’d driven to the camp as fast as her old Nissan could take her when she’d got the call that morning. If only she knew what exactly had gone wrong. The caller had been so cryptic, refusing to give out any details. Didn’t they understand a mother needed to know everything when their child was involved? She’d alternated between rage and fear the whole drive.

Actually arriving at the camp hadn’t done anything to relieve her fear either. She’d expected a worker would rush her straight to her son’s side, but that hadn’t happened at all. Instead she was led to the office, though she kept her eyes on the infirmary, distinguishable by the red cross on its door. Was Tejay in there? Or was it some other kind of problem? The caller had said it was urgent, so she had to assume he’d been hurt in some way. But she’d still been given no answers and then simply left to wait for someone named Mr Belton.

She was sitting there, a tangle of nerves, when a something sharp pricked the bottom of her leg. It was so sharp and sudden she leapt up out of the seat. She scanned the chair to see what on earth she could have sat on, but there was nothing there. She carefully felt her jeans to see if there was something sharp stuck in them, but no luck there either. She began to wonder if it was just her nerves getting to her. She needed to calm down.

Sitting back down in another chair, Claire took several deep breaths, trying to slow her pounding heart. To her surprise this worked well, she could already feel her tension easing. In fact she was feeling much better, much more relaxed. Her heart-rate slowed to normal and she was even able to lean back in the chair. She did notice her vision seemed to be blurring a bit around the edges but this didn’t really worry her either. It was more important that she stay calm, she didn’t want to scare Tejay when she saw him.

The door to the main office swung open and Belton emerged, smiling at the thin blonde woman, about forty years old, sitting back in the waiting room chair looking at the wall with glassy eyes. “Hello there Mrs Morris, I’m Rowan Belton, camp director,” he greeted, striding across the room and extending his hand.

Claire took his hand and shook it, still looking out of it. “Please, call me Claire,” she told him.

“Okay then Claire, please come with me,” he directed, gesturing to the office.

Seeming to recall the urgency of why she was there Claire shook her head and asked, “But what about Tejay? They said it was urgent. Is he okay?”

Belton chuckled lightly to put her at ease. “Oh of course he is. Tejay is just fine and you aren’t worried about him at all. You’d just like to come have a chat with me, wouldn’t you?” Belton suggested.

Claire’s brief look of apprehension faded and she nodded, smiling weakly. Belton led her into the office, satisfied the drug had taken hold. He led her to the chair facing his desk, then took his seat. “You’re feeling quite comfortable now,” he stated, rather than asked.

Claire nodded, the chair did feel quite comfortable in fact. She was feeling so relieved to know that Tejay was okay, that she’d been all worried for nothing. She should have been angry at them for misleading her, but she just couldn’t seem to muster any anger at all. She felt increasingly relaxed in fact.

“So why am I here then? If Tejay is okay.”

“Oh, I felt you needed a progress report, given your special requests for him,” Belton explained.

“Right, of course,” she said with a nod, accepting his explanation instantly.

“You wanted your little boy back, but you wanted him less sports crazed, cleaner, softer. Right?”

“Yes, that’s right. I don’t want him getting hurt.”

“Of course not. You’re his mummy. You just want him safe and happy.”

“Exactly.”

“Well let me tell you the programme has worked perfectly in that way. Tejay has been showing more interest in gymnastics than contact sport.”

Claire was overjoyed to hear that. She so worried her boy would break his neck playing rugby.

“He’s become a very sweet little boy, very friendly and loving,” Belton continued.

“Really? I mean, he was always so tough, such a little man,” Claire explained.

“Well he isn’t like that anymore. The only thing is, well I wanted to talk to you today about what might happen in the future if we leave things as they are.”

Claire shook her head. “What do you mean?”

“Well I can’t guarantee Tejay won’t grow right back up to be a rugby player again. It’s been known to happen.”

Claire seemed more upset now, though her body remained relaxed in the chair. “But you said this would fix all that.”

“Well with the limits you put on us we can only guarantee so much,” Belton sighed.

“Limits?”

“Well the age you chose, for instance. A seven year old has already developed much of his sense of identity. It’s also an age where he’ll want to emulate his peers, play rough. I think for what you want for him a younger age would be better.”

Claire found herself nodding. Yes, a younger age would be better. She didn’t want him hanging around with so many dirty, rough and tumble boys. That was just asking for trouble.

Belton went on. “Think of all the cuts and bruises he got as a seven-year old. Think of all the dirt-stained shirts, the holes he ripped in his good clothes. You don’t really want that again, do you?”

“No,” Claire agreed. “I don’t want that.”

Belton smiled again. He could see that she was coming along nicely. The drug flowing through her veins, already heavily affecting her mind, was closely related to the one used on the campers. Right now she felt conscious but she was actually in a sort of trance, highly suggestible. Later she’d think his ideas were her own and this whole session would be recalled as little more than a daydream. Satisfied she was ready for the key suggestions Belton went on.

“To really have your sweet little boy back you need him even younger. You need him to be three years old. That’s the perfect age for Tejay.”

Claire struggled for a moment with what the man was saying. Did she really want Tejay to be that little? He’d need her total care at that age. He wouldn’t even be able to go to school. “Really?” she asked.

“Of course. Then he’ll be free of all outside influences. You would be his world. You would be his protector, his provider, his everything. He would adore you. He’d need you.”

Claire’s hesitancy was waning. That did sound good, keeping Tejay free of all those nasty things in the real world that could harm him, corrupt him.

“Just think about how much more affectionate he could be. A seven-year old doesn’t want his friends seeing him get a hug from mummy. A three-year old happily announces that he wants cuddles with his mummy. Don’t you want to cuddle Tejay up on your lap?”

Claire nodded vigorously now. “Yes, that would be lovely!” she agreed, picturing it in her mind.

“A little toddler boy is what you really want Claire. You want Tejay sweet-tempered and openly affectionate. A little tyke who cuddles in mummy’s lap while she reads to him, pecks baby kisses on her cheeks before being tucked in for the night, crawls into her bed in the morning for snuggles. You want Tejay to be less bound by gender roles, just the way a toddler is. A toddler doesn’t understand such things. Tejay can walk around in mummy’s shoes, dance ballet and watch Dora the Explorer without thinking any of it was ‘girly’.”

“Yes, that’s exactly what I want,” Claire declared.

“Of course it is,” Belton told her. He wasn’t sure how much of her decision was due to the drug and how much due to his persuasiveness. But he knew the drug was necessary for the next part.

“Well I have good news for you then,” he informed her.

“What?”

“Tejay is three-years old already. And I know that makes you very happy.”

Claire knew he was right, she was happy. She had her little sweetie back.

“Can I see him?”

“In a moment. But we need to make one more important decision right now.”

“What’s that?”

“You need to sign this paper authorising us to freeze Tejay’s age at his current level,” Belton told her, gesturing to a legal form on his desk, pen right beside it.

“What? But I don’t want that,” Claire exclaimed.

“Of course you do Claire,” Belton corrected. “You don’t want your sweet little boy to grow up to be a nasty big boy who shuns his mummy and causes her all sorts of worries. You want him to stay at home with you where you can watch him and keep him safe.”

Claire shook her head, trying to understand why he was saying these things. She didn’t want that, did she? He said she did, so maybe she’d told him that earlier. How could she have forgotten? Claire tried to clear her mind but it was all foggy. If only Belton would stop talking so she could collect her thoughts.

“You know that’s what you want Claire. You love the idea of Tejay staying little and dependent on you forever. You know that is what will make him the happiest. You know he’ll be so much happier being free of all those nasty outside influences, free to play however he likes without worrying if he’s being girly.”

Of course she wanted Tejay to be happy. That was what was most important to Claire. She wanted a happy little boy, free to play how he liked. She wanted him protected from the nasty world, innocent, safe. She was nodding her head again. Belton was smiling at her now.

“That’s right Claire. You can’t let him grow up again. You want him to enjoy being free from worry, free from pressures. No more homework, no deadlines, just endless play. You want him to stay a carefree toddler. Just sign the paper.”

Claire found herself leaning forward and taking the pen, signing on the line Belton pointed to. She knew what she was doing was right. She never wanted Tejay to be unhappy again.

“Very good Claire. Now, Susan will take you down to see your little one,” he told her, pressing a button on his phone.

The door behind her swung open and a young camp counsellor helped Claire to her feet. Belton watched with satisfaction as Claire left the room, still a bit dazed and unsteady on her feet. Another child saved from the scourge of adulthood he thought. Now it was time to deal with the Smithsons. It was trickier dealing with couples but he’d developed tried and true techniques over the years so he wasn’t too worried. So he pressed the little red button on his phone that would get the whole thing rolling.